I must be one of those people who thrives on high energy, because things have gotten very interesting in my class lately as we near portfolio time.
Maybe it is because I have worked very hard up until now, and after this my students' success is in their own hands. All I can really do is let go and wish them well.
Maybe it is because I've set aside the thesis project to take up at a later date. In its absence, everything else is manageable.
Or maybe it is because I have finally risen above the clouds in the heartbreak that has been dragging at my heels for three straight months.
Whatever it is, life is better -- at last.
There is still so much to do, but I have a vague sense of having survived something.
I have never, ever experienced a more difficult semester, and let me just put it out there that all my semesters of grad school except the first one have been dogged by personal drama. Every semester that I've made it through has felt like a miracle -- and this one was worst of all.
OK bits of news:
The international program had a drop in enrollment and doesn't need me to teach for them in the spring after all. So now, I have to think about what to do for a living come January. The joys of job-hunting.
Today my students filled out evaluation forms about me. Those completed forms went to the department office where they will be compiled in some way and made available to me later. What will my students say about me?
And today, I realized I am going to miss them and how lucky I was that I got to work closely with them, to read their work and their thoughts and opinions, to help them on their academic road.